"Virginia is for lovers. Texas is for jobs." - Texas Governor Rick Perry
Or, more accurately, South Carolina is for lovers.
Or, more accurately, South Carolina is for lovers.
No, actually your a senator.
Hey, “I call ‘em like I see ‘em”
Well, lock up your young ones, Obama is once again trying to brainwash your children. He plans to broadcast his message to every child in the country. This time, he’s telling them to stay in school. What will he do next? Try to reduce crime? Help poor people? I for one will not stand for this outrageous morality. We cannot allow our children to be dragged into this cult they call “education”. That is why I’m spreading the word. Every child I see is going to hear about the dangers of learning. When I’m through, every kid in the tri-state area will be a truant.
Initially, designating a place where the common man can scream at the government in person seemed like an OK idea. But as things have progressed, the common man has turned into more of a bitchy next door neighbor. “What has health insurance ever done for ME?” or “You tell me RIGHT NOW how this will help ANYONE”. These confrontations have me calling Jerry Springer not focusing on a lucid agreement. I’m waiting for these people to pull out their pitchforks. Formerly docile towns across America have transformed into angry conservative mobs, screaming bloody murder at the sound of a poor person getting an MRI.
It may be true that to the media, news from six weeks ago is like asking them to remember what they ate for breakfast last November, but bear with me here. It has come to my attention that people still drive Hummers. Have we tree hugging, sandal wearing, tofu eating Liberals not been clear enough? I thought we established that these cars belong in the depths of Hell, where they came from. Our suffering environment is just the tip of the iceburg, or at least it would be if we still had those. Anyway, since no one cares but Bono and Al Gore, I have made it my personal responsibility to save the world. I have handed every homeless person within a 20-mile radius a dozen eggs to distribute onto the windshields of Hummers. Hopefully, they won’t do anything stupid with the eggs like eat them. It is my thought that these juvenile acts of vandelism with unite the world in a quest for the greater good. Either that or everyone’s insurance rates will go up.
It is only natural for Republicans to hate every solitary word spewed forth by Democrats. This is ofcourse what spawned the saying ” They’re fighting like Elephants and Donkeys”. Or maybe it was cats and dogs. Anyway, it is not surprising Republicans hated Cash for Clunkers. But the problem here is not that it didn’t work . The problem is that it worked too well. Every American from L.A to Washington D.C was speeding out of their driveway for a quick 4000 dollars. And who wouln’t? What is anyone going to do with a 1984 Subaru XT? Within days the program ran out of funding and the relentless gloating began. We say potato, they say “screw you, get a job and buy your own potato”. It is impossibly easy to let these issues consume your thoughts, seep into your brain while your playing Solitaire at work or throwing darts at a poster of Bill O’Reilly.
